Week 8

Part one:

We started class out with writing about the word conflict. “Once a negative climate has been set, it is stoked by other unconstructive communication” (Wood, T., Julia 2010) this is how arguments and conflicts get out of control, great saying. We had to put conflict in the middle of our paper and branch off of it. I had argument, yelling, disagreeing, solving a problem, and war. As you can see all my words were more on the negative side then the positive side. I really didn’t look at conflict as positive, until we did this activity. For positive conflict there can be, gets everyone involved, develops understanding and skills, and causes real communication. As a group we made a PowerPoint about life skills: conflict. I thought our power point turned out really good. Each one of us took a quiz to see how we solved conflict, I was collaborating, which is working together to solve a problem, trying to make everyone happy not matter what it takes. Which I think is definitely me I always think of others when trying to solve a problem. As a class we tried to guess what everyone was and how they solved problems. We guess most of them right and others were harder. We also played a game that you were supposed to win as much money as you could. It didn’t go very well as a class we went into the negatives. Nobody really caught onto the game. At the end of class we started writing about a problem to Dear Abby, and the class was supposed to help us solve our problem.

Part two:

Out of the four choices I would have to say when my boyfriend and I first started dating we always did the exit response. We would both get in an argument and get really fired up over nothing and either storm out or go for a walk or something. We never solved the problem or talked about it just let it go away. Which really didn’t help the problem because later down the road it always got brought up again but now I would definitely say we have grown and use voice response. We try to solve the problem then, and listen to what each have to say. We try not to get as heated up so we can talk about the conflict and solve it because usually its nothing to be fighting over and ruining our time we spend together.

Week 7

Chapter 7

Part 1

Chapter 7 starts out on emotional intelligence, how a person recognizes their feelings, how they act with their feelings, and which ones are necessary for the situation. The author says “In her 1989 book Anger: The Misunderstood Emotion, Carl Tavris argues that anger is not entirely basic or instinctual. She shows that our ability to experience anger is influenced by social interaction, through which we learn whether and when we are supposed to feel anger” (Wood, T., Julia. 2010). I really liked what she had said there, because sometimes I get really angry and I think to myself later why am I so angry. Sometimes it just takes over and there is no control. We need to learn to identify our emotions, how we express them, and when we express them. It’s like you have to think before you express what you are about to express for people to judge you! 

Part 2:

I think that anger should be expressed in another form but yelling or shouting. I think that yelling just makes the other person more upset and it keeps the others raging. Maybe instead of yelling they could to be silent. That would make an awkward feeling in the room and would maybe help the other person realize that something is the matter. Instead of yelling they group or people talk quietly about their feelings. They could also when they get angry walk away cool off and then carry on their conversation. Know when those anger feelings are coming and control them.

Week 6

Chapter 6

Assignment:

Mindful listening is the topic of the week and I was looking through the book and really liked this saying “To listen well, we rely on our ears, mind, and hearts” (Wood, T., Juliea, 2010). We listened to each other talk and had to keep them talking no matter what it took. My partner was really hard to keep talking. We had to listen, keep eye contact, and keep repeating what they are saying so they know that you are listening to them. We had to practice on staying interested and keep them talking. I thought it was pretty hard, especially when you are with someone that doesn’t really like to talk in front of a class anyways. Then we practiced talking each other through a maze of balls while we had a handkerchief over our eyes so we couldn’t see and we had to give good direction to get them to the end without touching anything.

I work with a girl at work that is a very good listener, not only with me but others. She makes you want to tell her anything because she is so into the conversation, even if she doesn’t want to be she always is. With customers that are having a problem or need help she keeps really good posture, eye contact, and repeats what they are saying so they know she is taking in what they are saying to her. She keeps her mind and what the person is talking about and doesn’t space out, she keeps bobbing her head so they know she is following them. She doesn’t interrupt them to tell them her story or what she is thinking, she lets them completely finish their story and then she begins to speak.

Week 5

Part one

We did nonverbal communication, which happens everyday and i never really thought of it. We started out with holding fingers in the middle equaling 22. Which our group it wasnt really that hard, but we were all females so that makes it easier. We read each other. We watched a video on how your body makes people read you. How far your head is tilted, what your hands are doing, and how your face expressions are. We then talked about all the diffrent ways to describe non verbal communication. One thing i thought was interesting was in the book " A final type of nonverbal behavior is silence, which can communicate powerful messages. " I'm not speaking to you" actually speaks volume." (woods, pg. 137) We talked about how clothing can make you diffrent or artifacts. How you dress yourself or your surroundings. We then as a group drew a big poster on all the non verbal communications and our groups poster turend out very colorful and great!!.

Part two

A persons message and communication can be seen any many ways. Your body language shows how you are feeling for the day. It shows what kind of person you are such as: your posture, the way you hold your body, the way you sit, and the way you move. Your face shows expression, it shows how you react to something, it shows how interested you are into the person talking, you have to be careful when communicating with others that you keep a positive face no matter what because we are all human and can read each other’s face expressions. Your eyes show tiredness, interested, if you have eye contact with the person or if your eyes are wondering and you are bored. Space a person uses I think is a big person, you notice how close a person gets to you while talking, or how distance someone will stay from people, I think it shows if you are a people person or like to keep to yourself. Your artifacts are what you wear or how you dress up your office, bedroom, house and many other things. It shows some of you personality’s. Touch I don’t think is that important or maybe its cause im not a touchy person and people don’t do it to me cause they know not to. I think touch comes with how much of a people person you are. The last one how you use silence and time, do u keep to yourself, can you not be alone, show what kind of person you are again.

My Week 4 is under Week 3

Couldn't figure out how to change it!!!

Week 3

Part 1

Well to start things off Miss Jackie was gone for the week so we had a sub all week. We focused on perception. We learned about the three process of perception: selective, organizing, and interpreting. We looked at a lot of random pictures that you can see more than one object. Some of us could see more than one and many could only see one. We compared how each of us saw the picture and how it was moving also. My favorite is the moving objects that are not really moving. It’s crazy how your eyes see things. The same size illusion ones were pretty crazy too. I didn’t think they were the same size. We then got in pairs and did perception questionnaire. I was with Dayle and I asked her: Do you believe you can always trust your first impression. She said no because it can change, people change, and they may be just having a bad day. We then started talking about stereotypes, how we judge people. One of the quotes from the book says “ A personal construct is a “mental yardstick” we use to measure a person or situation along a bipolar dimension of judgments” (Kelly, 1995). The next day we talked about ways in improve your interpersonal perception. I said not to assume things ask more questions, and try harder to look at perception like this. I guess in a way care more. We had to do self- disclosure, which I didn’t really like because its school and not a time for things like that. Yah a lot of people just said I don’t like my sister, or I don’t like country or something like that, but I didn’t like that activity. I don’t like to share with strangers. We watched a video at the end about racism, I thought it was an okay video and learned a few things. I didn’t agree with a lot of things on it because I think when a person is racist most likely they are not going to change. They have a reason for it and won’t change. But again that is stereotyping J

Part2

My physiology probably comes out some days. Like when im tired or stressed I want to be left alone. People annoy me and I probably come off as a bitch but I’m really not. So for me I probably need to practice on when im tired or stressed to keep a positive attitude. Age I don’t compare a lot at work. Because I know when an old man comes in he is going to be a lot more picky and not want to change. He is going to want that product and nothing else. He is then going to be rude and get mad because we no longer carry the product he wants. Culture and social location is a hard one for me to think of. I guess I could compare to my work again because I am in a fashion store, most men would not sell our products very well. Although we do have our feed and tack side and men do treat us women different because they think we don’t know what we are talking about because we are women. Which can be really frustrating at times and you just have to keep a smile. Roles I have to be interested in something to pay attention or else I am thinking what else I have to do today and what a waste of time and money something is. Cognitive abilities is how you think of someone; like nice or not nice. That is not a very big range but that is how I think of people usually. The last one self I see myself as positive but others may see me as negative, its just how people see things and in everybodys mind it will be different, so really its not that big of a deal..

Part 3

Well when u compare other people of course it will be diffrent, because everybody has diffrent opinions. when i looked at others we all had some things in common but most of it was a little diffrent on how we looked at certain subjects..

week 4

Part 1

We first did a really awesome activity to explain language. We did a wordle, which mine is below, and I had a lot of words for language. We then had to build a bridge with our classmates. Jackie broke us up into teams and had one team stay in one room and one team go into the other room. We had to explain to each other how to build the bridge, but we could only send one person into the hall way at a time and then they had to explain to us what they said. Needless to say the bridges did not look alike. I knew they wouldn’t because of course nobody is going to remember exactly what they heard or exactly what they built so our bridges did not look like a mirror like they were supposed to. In the power point it says “ communication is easy to do but difficult to do well”, and it’s so true everybody communicates in some way it’s just how well they do it, and how well someone understands them. I was gone for the second day of class but looking over the power point looks like we did I-language. Some examples were you hurt me to I feel hurt when you ignore what I say. We talked a lot about language. Then we started talking about speech communities, when you share norms with people. Women and men are in different categories. Your friends are probably in the same speech communities, people that you have things in common with.

Part 2

Communication to show:

Respect: A person shows respect by serving for their country,  opening doors for someone, being polite, and overall just being nice to people is respect.

Support: Helping family, helping others, I think a big role in support is the word “Helping”

Love: Caring for others, Marriage, and showing that you care.

Ambition: Going to college, following that dream job, getting your work done, working hard.

Dissatisfaction: This one is hard:, Maybe being angry, showing that you don’t care.

"I am" poem

I am Poem

I am shy and outgoing

I wonder were my life will go

I hear my dad’s voice

I see images in the clouds

I want to be well-off in life

I am shy and outgoing

I pretend ill live forever

I feel my grams presence

I touch the stars

I worry about not being good enough

I cry for my family

I am shy and outgoing

I understand how much I mean to you

I say “be the best that you can be”

I dream about rodeo

I try to change

I hope to have kids one day

I am shy and outgoing

week 2 refection

Another beautiful day in interpersonal relations ;) We started out with self-identity. Who you are, how you present yourself. We wrote an I am poem, which is posted on my blog for you to read. They I am poem was fun, and at the same time hard. I never think in some of the ways Jackie wanted us too. Which is awesome cause it is expanding my thinking habits. Not to just stay in my little box, but to expand. I made an awesome collage J we picked pictures out of magazines, which I really enjoyed, I like making college on my free time.  The categories for our collage where physical, emotional, social, and integument. Johari window really made me think deep about myself. I do have many hidden things I keep from people, but I am also open. I know what to share and what not too. I described myself as involved and focused, Janey and Caleb described me as hardworking, creative, and outgoing. So I think I was pretty close to what they said. On the self awareness questions in the computer lab I scored a 50% I was about in the middle on everything. I do care what people think of me and how they look at me. I am a little shy at times. I really liked this quote in the power poit. People often say that this or that person has not yet found himself.  But the self is not something one finds, it is something one creates.  Thomas Szasz, "Personal Conduct," The two principles we choose as a group for indent effect on their communication. Labeling, we believe people labels others before they get to know them. So, they judge them before they get a chance. Also we choose shy because they let people walk all over them. They also don’t get enough information or are scared to ask questions.

I would have to say money is a big thing it today’s society. I think it changes me in many ways. If I had more money I probably wouldn’t be so stressed out all the time. I also would get to enjoy my hobby a lot more. Go to a lot more rodeos and not have to worry about how I am going to pay this entry. I also think it keeps me distant from my friends and family back home. If I had money I would go home every other weekend. So in my life I think money could change a lot of things for me. I think another one that will really change my life is education, it will make me a better person. Maybe make the money thing a little easier with a good career behind me. I think I meet new people with and education and always keeps my brain running and learning new things everday.

Wood, J.T. (2010). Interpersonal Communication: Everyday encounters.

week 1 refection

First day of class :)
Part 1. Got to meet new people, learn new names, and new faces. We played an ice breaker game, throwing around a ball, and where ever your thumb landed that was what you had to talk about. It was a good way to get to know each other. Its nice cause most colleges wouldn't do this.  We Played an activity, asking questions on how to interview a person to get to know them. My three questions were, what do you like to do on your spare time?, Do you have any kids or married?, and Why are you back in school?. I really enjoyed getting to know everyone in my class cause most of the people I knew their face but not who they are, so it was nice to put a personality with the face. We then formed groups and had to make a project that were good rules to follow during this class and quarter. It was really fun but, when we had to get in front of everyone and present it was a little strange with the recording, i think it made us a little nervous. Our presentation didnt flow as good as I thought it would be hopefully watching our video it will get better :) We then went to the computer lab and made our lay outs for our bloggers. I had a lot of fun doing that because I was playing witht he templates, which I love to do.
Part 2.
Communicating is the key: Without communication we can not work together. In this world everything is in some form of communication. We have to speak to each other, we have to communicate to get to know each other, every work place has some kind of communication.
Words can not be changed: A lot of people miss understand what someone has said or what they meant. Communication can be changed by your expression by the way you write it so that is why its so important for communication to be read right.
Ethical choices: " Ethical issues concern right and wrong." ( Wood, 2010) People don't realize that there is a right and wrong in communication. If you don't express your words right then that is wrong and that is why people are going to miss understand you. People need to realize the right and wrong of coummunnication.
Matacommunication: This is strange to me communcation about communication. Its how you express yourself. How people read your expressions. The body language you use, how tense you are, and what diffrent styles you use.

How would you rate your own effectiveness with interpersonal communications? with family? with friends? at work? at school?

I would have to say my communication skills with my family are probably not the best. I am getting better the older I get, but I tend to get busy and not call them. I would have to say my communication skills with my mom are a lot better than my dad. There are reasons for that but, I probably should get better communication skills for him no matter what the reason is. With work I have amazing communication skills. It’s how you keep a job without communications you will have problems and may get fired. I keep my communication very clearly so there is no assumptions are questions. School also I keep very good communications skills with. In school you have to keep communications skills with the teachers if you want a good grade :P Can’t be missing school and not informing the teacher . I think overall communication skills are a big key in our lives.

Wood, J.T. (2010). Interpersonal communications: Everyday encounters (6th ed.). Boston, MA: Wadsworth

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